On September 16th, 2021, my fourth day on Stanford campus, a car charged towards me at 40 mph. Campus police responded to my report with a phone call and interrogated me on the details of the incident. The officer on the phone said because I wasn’t physically hurt, there was no basis to call it a hate crime. they ended the call saying they would archive the file and look at it again if anything similar happening in the future. I was left with no resources or support. There was no campus wide alert. I felt completely silenced and unsafe in my own body and on campus. God Forgive Me for The Curses I Cast On These Graves is a photo series illustrating my feelings towards Stanford University, the campus, its history, and its founders. With its primary subject being Hoover Tower and the Stanford Family Mausoleum, the photos emulate the weight of the supremacy that is constantly looming over me where ever I stand. The photos stand as reminders of the conservative colonial histories that made Stanford and led to the hate crime committed against me. The series does not intend to recreate “Imposter syndrome” but instead redefine it: I am the Imposter. The system was not built for me and it does not want to support me, just as the Stanford Family would have felt the same.

The story of Leland Stanford Jr’s fascination with Egyptian artifacts and his cabinet of curiosities stays present in my mind. After her son’s death, Jane Stanford traveled to Egypt and collected other artifacts to display in the museum built in memory of her son. The collection included a large number of sarcophagi bought through illegal trade popular among European imperialists at the time. After the 1902 Earthquake, the Egypt wing of the Cantor was destroyed along with the 27 mummies housed inside it. All that remains of the bodies are fragments of Funerary masks and a mummified foot held in the Cantor archives.

Even the Sphinxes guarding the Stanford Family graves are a reminder of their role in the colonization of my country. It is my firm belief the sphinxes would not want to be there if they knew who they were guarding. The sphinx represents strength, authority, sacred status, and scourge. The Stanford name is not worthy to be protected by these creatures. They are the same people that the Sphinx would protect against. At times it is the only reminder on campus of home, but to visit them is to visit the graves of my oppressors, and I don’t greet them with prayers.